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CHUYỆN TRONG NHÀ – ANH VIỆT ĐỐI CHIẾU

MURAKAMI Haruki

Hai bản dịch Anh và Việt từ nguyên tác tiếng Nhật của truyện ngắn "Family

Affair" của Murakami Haruki, được trình bày song ngữ đối chiếu dưới đây, tiện

cho độc giả cảm nhận đôi điều khác biệt về văn hóa Đông Á và Âu Mỹ trong việc

đọc và dịch văn Nhật Bản.

IT PROBABLY HAPPENS all the time, but I disliked

right from the start. And the less I

liked him, the more doubts I had about her. I was

disappointed in her for the choice she had made.

m just narrow-minded. My sister certainly

seemed to think so. We didn

t talk about my feelings,

but she knew I didn

and she let her

annoyance show.

ve got such a narrow view of things," she said.

At the time, we were talking about spaghetti. She was

telling me that I had a narrow view of spaghetti. This

was not all she had in mind, of course. Her

lurking somewhere just beyond the spaghetti, and she

was really talking about him. We were fighting over him

tình trên đờ

tôi đã không

hôn với chàng ta. Thật tình tôi đã thấ

ế là vì tính tôi

tôi. Chúng tôi ngoài

không đả độ

hòi quá đấ

ề món mì Ý.

ỉ trích tôi

nhiên, cô ấ

mì Ý mà thôi. Phía

đại-lý đó thôi.

Đúng lúc tôi

mì Ý nên đồ

Chúng tôi vào

có cà-dái-dê và

ật, mà lại là ngày đẹ

quá, mà phó-mát

thì không nói gì,

Jay RUBIN translated

It all started one Sunday afternoon when she suggested

we go out for Italian food. "Fine," I said, since I just

happened to be in the mood for that. We went to a cute

little spaghetti house that had recently opened up across

from the station. I ordered spaghetti with eggplant and

garlic, and she asked for pesto sauce. While we waited, I

had a beer. So far, so good. It was May, a Sunday, and

the weather was beautiful.

The problem started with the spaghetti itself, which was

a disaster. The surface of the pasta had an unpleasant,

floury texture. The center was still hard and uncooked.

Even a dog would have turned its nose up at the butter

they had used. I couldn

t eat more than half of what was

on my plate, and I asked the waitress to take the rest

away. My sister glanced at me once or twice but didn

say anything at first. Instead, she took her time, eating

everything they had served her, down to the last thread. I

sat there, looking out the window and drinking another

CHUYỆN TRONG NHÀ

Phạm Vũ Thịnh dịch

t that bad. You could have forced yourself."

"Why should I? It

s my stomach, not yours."

s a brand-new restaurant. The cook

used to the kitchen. It wouldn

t have killed you to give

him the benefit of the doubt," she said, and took a sip of

the thin, tasteless-looking coffee they had brought her.

"You may be right," I said, "but it only makes sense for

a discriminating individual to leave food he doesn

"Well, excuse me, Mr. Know-it-all."

s your problem? That time of the month again?"

"Oh, shut up. I deserve better than that from you."

"Take it easy," I said. "You

re talking to a guy who

knows exactly when your periods started. You were so

late, Mom took you to see a doctor."

re going to get my pocketbook right between the

" She was turning serious, so I shut up.

"The trouble with you is, you

re so narrow-minded

about everything," she said as she added cream to her

coffee (meaning it was tasteless, after all). "You only see

the negative things. You don

t even try to look at the

good points. If something doesn

t measure up to your

standards, you won

s so annoying."

"Maybe so. But it

s my life, not yours."

t care how much you hurt people. You

just let them clean up your mess. Even when you

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I remember when you were in high school you used to

do it in your sheets. The women of the family had to

clean up after you. The least you could do is masturbate

without getting it all over your sheets."

t have to make such a show of leaving your

food," she said when the waitress had taken her plate.

ll be more careful from now on," I said. "Now,

này, làm gì đế

ỏ thái độ khó

ủa cô đã đượ

. Tôi đáp, đơ

ột tí có phả

ưởng là ông lão bà cụ thô tục cãi nhau

ạ dày của cô

Có khác nhau lắm không thì tôi cũng không rõ.

ẽ cô nói đúng.

ỳ hay gì đấ

ũng nói đượ

Có gì đâu mà cô

ừ lúc nào thì đã

Thôi, thôi đ

cái xách này vào

ồi, nên tôi nín thinh.

hòi quá đấ

mà phê phán,

ế nên em bực mình

ười khác. Như

ười khác đấ

ẽ để ý để

"Okay, but you don

t have to hurt people. Why don

you try a little harder? Why don

t you look at the good

t you at least show some restraint? Why

t you grow up?"

Now she had touched a sore spot. "I am grown up. I can

show restraint. And I can look at the good side, too. I

just not looking at the same things you are."

s what I mean. You

re so arrogant. That

t got a steady girlfriend. I mean, you

twenty-seven years old."

"Of course I have a girlfriend."

"You mean a body to sleep with. You know I

Do you enjoy changing partners every year? How about

love and understanding and compassion? Without those,

s the point? You might as well be masturbating."

t change partners every year, do I?"

"Pretty much. You ought to think about your life more

seriously, act more like a grownup."

That marked the end of our conversation. She just tuned

Why had her attitude toward me changed so much over

the past year? Until then, she had seemed to enjoy being

partners with me in my resolutely aimless life-style,

she even looked up to me to

some extent. She had become gradually more critical of

me in the months since she had begun seeing her fiancé.

ạn gái thì có đấ

ủ-dâm thôi chứ có gì khác đâu

ản kháng, yế

ột tí, có phả

ư hoàn toàn không

ngoái đây, cô còn

phê phán tôi

chàng vị-hôn-phu của cô.

ủ-dâm, mà tôi

đăng-tên đầ

tiên lúc nào

ĩ nhiên không

tôi (tôi đoán là

chúng tôi thân

ĩ, tôi lại càng cả

forgive me for repeating myself, but it just so happens

that I have my own life. I know what I like and I know

s as simple as that."

This, to me, seemed tremendously unfair. She had been

seeing him for a few months, but she and I had been

"seeing" each other for twenty-three years. We had

always gotten along well, practically never had a fight. I

t know a brother and sister who could talk so

honestly and openly with each other, and not only about

masturbation and periods: She knew when I first bought

condoms (I was seventeen), and I knew when she first

bought lace underwear (she was nineteen). I had dated

her friends (but not slept with them, of course), and she

had dated mine (but not slept with them, of course

s just how we were brought up. This

excellent relationship of ours turned sour in less than a

year. The more I thought about it, the angrier it made

She had to buy a pair of shoes at the department store

near the station, she said. I left her outside the restaurant

đã nói, đấ

không thích. Làm

khó nhìn vào ư

ưởng thành hơ

không nhìn vào cùng

ồi mà chẳng có người yêu đàng hoàng nào cả

"Are you some kind of connoisseur of sunsets?" But

still she accepted, probably out of kindness.

I picked her up, and we drove out along the shore just

beyond Yokohama to a bar with a view of the ocean. I

drank four glasses of I.W. Harper on the rocks, and she

had two banana daiquiris (can you believe it?). And we

watched the sun go down.

"Are you going to be okay driving with that much to

drink?" she asked.

"No problem. Where alcohol is concerned, I

"Four drinks are just enough to bring me up to normal.

t got a thing to worry about. Not a thing."

We drove back to Yokohama, ate, and enjoyed a few

kisses in the car. I suggested we go to a hotel, but she

m wearing a tampon."

"So take it out."

"Yeah, right. It

s my second day."

And what a day it was. At this rate, I should have just

had a date with my girlfriend. But no, this was going to

be the day I spent a nice, leisurely Sunday with my

sister, something we hadn

t done for a long time. So

much for that plan.

"Sorry," said the girl. "I

m telling you the truth."

"Never mind. It

s not your fault. I

re to blame for my period?" she asked with an

s just the way things worked out."

What a stupid question.

I drove her to her house in Setagaya. On the way, the

clutch started making funny rattling noises. I

have to bring it into the garage soon, I thought with a

sigh. It was one of those classic days, when one thing

goes wrong and then everything goes with it.

and went back to our apartment alone. I gave my

girlfriend a call, but she wasn

t in. Which wasn

surprising. Two o

clock on a Sunday afternoon was not

the best time to ask a girl for a date. I flipped the pages

of my address book and tried another girl

had met at some disco. She answered the phone.

"Like to go out for a drink?"

clock in the afternoon."

ll drink till the sun goes down. I know the

perfect bar for watching the sunset. You can

re not there by three."

gái khác. Cô này là

viên, tôi đã

quán disco nào đấy. May quá, cô ấ

. Cô nói, có vẻ làm biế

này, ở đấ

hoàng hôn thì

ứ không thì hế

ẳn là vì tính cô vố

i "Banana Daiquiri", v

. Cô hỏi, có vẻ

đã thấm vào đâu

ả. Không sao đâu em

Chán cái anh này

Đã nhét nút bông rồi mà

Đùa hay nhỉ

ới ngày thứ hai mà

ngày gì đâu.

ĩ là lâu ngày

mình nên đã dành ngày

. Cô gái nói.

không hiểu tôi nói gì.

cô gái nào đấ

ại tôi kia chứ

c trong xe, tuy nh

ll think about it."

"You do that. Thinking is good for you. It keeps you

from getting senile."

"Where do you live? Can I come and visit?"

"Sorry. I live with my sister. We

ve got rules. I don

bring women home, and she doesn

"Yeah, like she

s really your sister."

s true. Next time I

ll bring a copy of our lease.

She laughed. "Okay."

I watched her go in through her gate. Then I started my

engine and drove home, listening for those clutch noises.

The apartment was pitch-black. I turned on the light and

called my sister

s name, but she wasn

t there. What the

hell was she doing out at ten o

clock at night? I looked

for the evening paper but couldn

t find it. Of course. It

I got a beer from the refrigerator and carried it and a

glass into the living room. I switched on the stereo and

dropped a new Herbie Hancock record on the turntable.

Waiting for the music to start, I took a long swallow of

beer. But nothing came from the speakers. Then I

remembered. The stereo had gone on the blink three

days earlier. The amp had power, but there was no

sound. This also made it impossible to watch TV. I have

one of those monitors without any sound circuitry of its

own. You have to use it with the stereo. I stared at my

silent TV screen and drank my beer. They were showing

an old war movie. Rommel

s Afrika Korps tanks were

fighting in the desert. Their cannons shot silent shells,

their machine guns shot silent bullets, and people died

silently, one after another.

I sighed for what must have been the sixteenth time that

ế nhà anh thì sao? Em đế

được không?

ề nhà, mà nó

ũng không mang bạ

Có thật là em gái không đấ

n sau, anh mang b

lái xe về nhà.

đây. Tôi tìm

làm gì có báo

vào phòng khách,

a Harvey Hancock

hình thôi, còn âm

hình câm trên

vô-thanh, súng

cho hai anh em m

phòng riêng biệt, tôi chỉ

ền thuê nhà.

"Can I invite you out again soon?" I asked.

"On a date? Or to a hotel?"

"Both," I said with a smile. "The two go together. You

know. Like a toothbrush and toothpaste."

HAD STARTED living with my sister five years earlier,

in the spring, when I was twenty-two and she was

eighteen. I had just graduated from college and taken my

first job, and she had just graduated from high school

and entered college. Our parents had allowed her to go

to school in Tokyo on the condition that she live with

me, a condition we were both glad to accept. They found

us a nice, big two-bedroom apartment, and I paid half

The thought of living with my sister was an almost

painless proposition. Not only did we get along well, as I

mentioned earlier, but our schedules matched well, too.

WorkingforthePRsectionofanappliance

manufacturer, I would leave the house fairly late in the

đến khách sạ

ĩ thì đầu óc chậm già đ

tôi thì sáng đ

So I sat next to her and held her hand

probably for the

first time since elementary school, when we went out

hunting dragonflies. Her hand was much bigger and

stronger than I remembered. Obviously. She cried for

two hours straight, never moving. I could hardly believe

the body was capable of producing such quantities of

tears. Two minutes of crying was all it took to dry me

By the time 3:00 a.m. rolled around, though, I had had it.

t keep my eyes open. Now it was my turn, as

the elder brother, to say something, though giving advice

was definitely not my line.

t want to interfere with the way you live your life,

s your life, and you should live it as you

"But I do want to give you one word of advice. Don

carry condoms in your purse. They

When she heard that, she grabbed the telephone book

that was sitting on the table and heaved it at me with all

"What are you doing snooping in my bag!" She always

threw things when she got mad. Which is why I didn

go on to tell her that I had never looked in her bag.

morning and come back late at night. She used to go out

early and come home as the sun was going down. In

other words, she was usually gone when I woke up and

asleep by the time I came back. And since my weekends

were mostly taken up with dates, I didn

t really talk to

my sister more than once or twice a week. We wouldn

have had time to fight even if we had wanted to, and we

t invade each other

s privacy. I assumed she had

her own things going, but I felt it was not my place to

say anything. She was eighteen, after all. What business

was it of mine who she slept with?

One time, though, I held her hand for a couple of

from one to three in the morning, to be exact. I

found her at the kitchen table, crying, when I got home

from work. Narrow-minded and selfish as I am, I was

smart enough to realize that if she was crying at the

kitchen table and not in her room she wanted some

comforting from me.

In any case, it worked. She stopped crying, and I was

able to get some sleep.

Our life-style stayed exactly the same, even after she

graduated from college and took a job with a travel

agency. She worked a standard nine-to-five day, while

my schedule became, if anything, looser. I

the office some time before noon, read the newspaper at

my desk, eat lunch, and finally get serious about doing a

ề nhà thì cô

Thêm vào đấ

không đả độ

ẳng là chuyện tôi quan tâm.

khóc ở bàn ă

khóc ở bàn ă

tôi làm gì đấ

dính dáng gì đế

tôi không làm,

nhiên thôi, có

phút là toàn thân khô rang ngay.

ưng làm sao mà tránh đượ

nào tùy ý em

không nên để

ưởng là con gái không đứ

ướng trên bàn, thẳng tay ném vào người tôi.

dòm vào xách

lên. Tính cô

Tôi không dám

nên thôi không

ờ dòm ngó gì

xách tay của cô cả

khóc, và tôi

chui vào chăn trên giường mình đượ

ờ sáng đế

thì càng ngày càng lè phè

báo ở bàn mình, ă

For her first summer vacation, my sister went to

California with a couple of friends on a package tour put

together by her agency. One of the members of the tour

group was a computer engineer a year her senior, and

she started dating him when they came back to Japan.

This kind of thing happens all the time, but it

me. First of all, I hate package tours, and the thought of

getting serious about somebody you meet in a group like

that makes me sick.

After she started seeing this computer engineer, though,

my sister began to glow. She paid a lot more attention to

appearances, both the apartment

s and her own. Until

then, she had gone just about everywhere in a work shirt

and faded jeans and sneakers. Thanks to her new interest

in clothing, the front closet filled up with her shoes, and

all the other closets were overflowing with wire hangers

from the cleaner

s. She was constantly doing laundry

and ironing clothes (instead of leaving them to pile up in

the bathroom like an Amazonian ants

cooking and cleaning. These were dangerous symptoms,

I seemed to recall from my own experience. When a

woman starts acting like this, a man has only one choice:

to clear out fast or marry her.

Then she showed me his picture. She had never done

anything like that before. Another dangerous symptom.

Actually, she showed me two pictures. One had been

taken on Fisherman

s Wharf in San Francisco. It showed

my sister and the computer engineer standing in front of

a swordfish and wearing big smiles on their faces.

"Nice swordfish," I said.

"Stop joking. I

"So what should I say?"

t say anything. This is him."

I took the photo again and studied his face. If there was

one single type of face in the world designed to arouse

instant dislike in me, this was it. Worse, something

about him reminded me of a particular upperclassman in

a high-school club of mine, a guy I hated

looking type, but absolutely empty-headed and a real

whiner. He had a memory like an elephant; once he had

some picky thing on you, he

d never let go. He made up

for lack of brains with this phenomenal memory.

"How many times have you done it with him?" I asked.

little something around two in the afternoon. Later, I

make arrangements with the guys from the ad agency,

d go out drinking till after midnight.

t be stupid," she said, blushing. "You don

đến quá nử

ừ ngày vào làm

nhiên là đượ

đâu trên cô

tôi thì khó. Đạ

ghét, và không thích gì

ế thì đàn ông

ải làm đám cưới

đầu tiên. Lạ

a San Francisco, em

Con cá tuna trông oai quá chứ

đùa có đượ

ện nghiêm trang đấ

ế cô muốn anh nói gì đây?

ải nói gì cả

này. Thêm vào đấ

Đúng là lấy trí nhớ ấ

đầu óc ngu tố

ế đã làm ă

The second photo had been taken after the trip. It

showed the computer engineer by himself. He wore a

leather jacket and was leaning against a big motorcycle,

his helmet perched on the saddle. His face had exactly

the same expression as in San Francisco. Maybe he

t have any other expressions.

"He likes motorcycles," she said.

"No kidding. I didn

t think he put on the leather jacket

just to have his picture taken."

Maybe it was another example of my narrow-minded

personality,butIcouldneverlikemotorcycle

the way they swagger around, so pleased with

themselves. I kept my mouth shut and handed the picture

"Well, then," I said.

"Well, then, what?"

"Well, then, what comes next?"

t know. We might get married."

"Has he proposed?"

"Sort of. But I haven

t given him my answer."

m not sure I want to get married. I

started working, and I think I

d like to take it easy, play

around a little more. Not go crazy like you, of course

s probably a healthy attitude," I offered.

s really nice. Sometimes I think

d like to marry him. It

I picked up the photos again and looked at them. I kept

my sigh to myself.

This conversation happened before Christmas.

One morning after New Year

s, my mother called me at

clock. I was brushing my teeth to Bruce

s "Born in the U.S.A." She asked if I knew

the man my sister was seeing. I said I didn

She said she had gotten a letter from my sister asking if

she could bring him home two weeks from Saturday.

"I suppose she wants to marry him," I said.

m trying to find out from you what kind

of man he is. I

d like to learn something about him

before I actually meet him."

ve never met the guy. He

s a year older than she

s a computer engineer. Works at one of those

three-letter places

IBM or NEC or TNT, I don

ve seen his picture. A nothing kind of face. Not my

taste, but then I don

t have to marry him."

ẳn là anh chàng không còn vẻ

ấy mê xe gắn máy lắ

. Em tôi nói.

hòi, tôi không

không nói gì

ảnh cho em tôi.

Chà … cái gì chứ

đã xin cưới cô rồi à?

ưng em còn suy nghĩ

dù không đế

ỗi quá quắ

ết hôn, nên cũng phân vân lắ

trên bàn lên

Và tôi cũng phân vân.

judge the whole world by your own standards. Not

everybody is like you, you know."

ười nào cũ

Lúc ấy là trướ

ễ Giáng Sinh.

ờ sáng. Tôi đ

Bruce Springsteen

"Born In America". M

không. Tôi đáp

ốn cùng anh ta về

Finally, though, I had no choice but to meet my sister

computer engineer. She was going to pay a formal visit

s home the following Sunday, and she

wanted me to come with her. I put on a white shirt and a

tie and my most conservative suit. They lived in an

imposing house in the middle of a nice residential

neighborhood in Meguro. The 500CC Honda I had seen

in the photo was parked in front of the garage.

"Nice swordfish."

"Please," she said, "none of your stupid jokes. All I

asking is that you restrain yourself for one day."

His parents were fine people, very proper

little too proper. The father was an oil-company

executive. Since my father owned a chain of gas stations

in Shizuoka, this was by no means an unthinkable

match. The mother served us tea on an elegant tray.

ư máy tính ấ

nên tôi đành đóng

ước nhà xe.

Cá tuna trông oai quá nhỉ

đùa vô duyên

ột ngày hôm nay thôi cũ

. Em tôi nói.

Ừ, thì thôi

thái quá. Ông

ốc trà đặt trên khay sang trọ

ẹ chúng tôi

ẹ chúng tôi

ẽ xin ông bà cho phép đế

ố đáp chúng tôi

cô đây, hôm

thì phía chúng tôi không thấy có trở

Tôi đoán là ông bà đã đ

và hay bị táo bón, thì có lẽ là họ không biế

"Where did he graduate from? Does he have a house?"

"How should I know?"

"Well, would you please meet him and find out about

m busy. Ask him yourself when you meet

him in two weeks."

I offered the father my calling card, and he gave me his.

Then I managed to dredge up all the proper phrases to

explain that I was here to represent my parents, who

were unfortunately unable to attend, owing to a previous

engagement; we hoped that on some future date

acceptable to both parties they might be allowed to pay

their formal respects.

He replied that his son had told him much about my

sister and that, meeting her now, he saw that she was far

lovelier than his son deserved. He knew we came from

an upstanding family, and as far as he and his wife were

concerned they had no objection to the "present

I imagined he must have had our family background

thoroughly investigated, but he couldn

t possibly have

found out that my sister had not had her first period until

she was sixteen and that she was chronically

Once the formalities ended without mishap, the father

poured me a brandy

pretty decent stuff. As we drank,

we talked about jobs of various kinds. My sister poked

me now and then with the toe of her slipper, warning me

not to drink too much.

The computer engineer, meanwhile, said nothing, but sat

next to his father all the while with a tense expression on

his face. You could see right away that he was under his

s thumb, at least while he remained in this house.

It figured. The sweater he was wearing had a strange

pattern of a kind I had never seen before, and its color

ọc nào, con cái nhà ai thế

i ngay anh ta c

giày vào chân tôi,

ượu quá chén.

ư máy tính ấ

ỉ nhìn thoáng

mái nhà này,

The conversation reached a lull around four o

we stood up to leave. The computer engineer saw us as

far as the station.

"How about a cup of tea?" he urged.

t want tea and I certainly didn

t want to sit at the

same table with a guy wearing such a weird sweater, but

it would have been awkward for me to refuse, so the

three of us went into a nearby coffeehouse. They ordered

coffee and I ordered beer, but the place didn

so I ordered coffee, too.

"Thanks so much for coming today," he said. "I

appreciate your help."

"Just doing what

s expected of me," I said simply. "No

thanks necessary." I had lost the energy to make

s told me so much about you

I scratched an earlobe with the handle of my coffee

spoon and returned it to the saucer. My sister gave me

another healthy kick, but its meaning seemed lost on the

computer engineer. Maybe he only got jokes in binary

"I envy the two of you being so close," he said.

"We kick each other in the leg when we

He took this with a puzzled expression.

s supposed to be a joke," grumbled my sister. "He

likes to say things like that."

"Just a joke," I concurred. "We share the housework.

She does the laundry and I do the jokes."

Thecomputerengineer

hisnamewasNoboru

gave a little laugh, as though this had solved

a problem for him.

"You two are so bright and cheery," he said. "That

kind of household I want to have. Bright and cheery is

"See?" I said to my sister. "Bright and cheery is best.

re too uptight."

"Not if the jokes are funny," she said.

clashed with his shirt. Why couldn

t she have found

somebody a little sharper?

"If possible, we

d like to marry in the autumn," said

Noboru Watanabe.

"Autumn is the best time for a wedding," I said. "You

can still invite the squirrels and bears."

He laughed. She didn

t. She was starting to look

seriously angry.

I excused myself and left.

thì chúng tôi

ư máy tính đư

a hai anh em ra

vào quán cà-phê nào đấ

được không ạ

nên đành đồ

cùng vào quán

cà-phê, còn tôi

ưng không có bia nên đành gọi cà-phê vậ

đã giúp chúng

lành thôi, vì

cho em nghe". C

cà-phê gãi lên dái

đá vào chân tôi

ư máy tính có

ẻ hoàn toàn không để ý đế

chân nhau đấ

ư máy tính có vẻ không hiể

nói đùa đấ

ẻ chán ngán ông anh. -

ưa nói đùa như

Đùa tí thôi

còn tôi thì chuyên

ệc nói đùa

ư máy tính, tên chính xác là

Noboru, nghe th

ế thì còn gì

có gia đình như

ẻ được là nhấ

. Em tôi nói.

. Watanabe Noboru nói.

và gấu còn mờ

thinh. Có vẻ cô bắ

Tôi nói là có chút việc nên phả

"What do you mean by that?" she asked.

s a serious individual. At least, more serious than I

re not serious at all."

m glad to hear that. Thanks,"

I said, looking at the ceiling.

"So, where did he graduate from?"

"Where did he go to college?"

"Ask him yourself," I said, and hung up. I was sick of all

this. I took a beer from the refrigerator and drank it

THE DAY AFTER the spaghetti argument with my

sister, I woke up at eight-thirty. It was another beautiful,

cloudless day, just like yesterday. In fact, it was like a

continuation of yesterday, and my life seemed to be

starting up again, too, after a halftime break.

I threw my sweat-dampened pajamas into the hamper,

took a shower, and shaved. While shaving, I thought

about the girl I hadn

t quite been able to get last night.

Ah, well, it just wasn

t in the cards. I did my best. I

have plenty more opportunities. Like next Sunday.

I toasted two slices of bread and warmed up some

coffee. I wanted to listen to an FM station but

remembered the stereo was broken. Instead, I read book

reviews in the paper and ate my toast. Not one of the

books reviewed was something I thought I

read: a novel on "the sex life of an old Jewish man,

mingling fantasy and reality," a historical study of

treatments for schizophrenia, a complete

1907 Ashio Copper Mine pollution incident. It

more fun to sleep with the captain of a girls

team. The newspaper probably chose books like this just

Back at the apartment, I phoned my mother and summed

up the afternoon for her.

s not such a bad guy," I said, scratching my ear.

Munching on my toast, I laid the paper on the table; then

I noticed a memo under the jam jar. In my sister

handwriting, it said that she had invited Noboru

Watanabe for dinner this Sunday and she expected me to

be there. I finished eating, brushed the crumbs off my

shirt, and put the dishes in the sink. Then I called the

travel agency. My sister took the phone and said, "I can

talk right now. I

ll call you back in ten minutes." The

call came twenty minutes later. In the meantime, I had

done forty-three push-ups, trimmed all twenty finger-

and toenails, picked out my shirt, necktie, jacket, and

pants for the day, brushed my teeth, combed my hair,

quát cho mẹ tôi.

ĩa là thế nào?

đàng hoàng. Ít

đàng hoàng hơ

có gì mà không đàng hoàng nào?

ước nhìn trần nhà.

ọc nào chứ

ột mình. Chán ngán mọ

áo lót và áo

ả kháng đó thôi,

ế nào cũng thành công.

bánh mì, và hâm cà-

ế thôi. Đọ

ủ-quân đội-con-gái đánh

bóng-chày-mề

i Watanabe Noboru

này, hãy ở nhà cùng

bánh mì bám trên áo,

i reo. Trong kho

tôi đã hít đấ

được 20 cái, và ngáp 2 lầ

"Yup. Sorry, but I

ve got a date this Sunday. Made it a

long time ago. If I had known, I would have left the day

open. Too bad."

"You expect me to believe that? I know what you

going to do: go somewhere and do something with some

girl whose name you hardly know. Well, you can do that

"Saturday I have to be in the studio all day with an

electric-blanket commercial. We

re busy these days."

"So cancel your date."

ll charge me a cancellation fee. And things

are at a pretty delicate stage with her."

"Meaning things are not so delicate in my case?"

t mean that at all," I said, holding the necktie

I had chosen next to the shirt hanging on a chairback.

ve got this rule not to trespass on

s lives. You eat dinner with your

ll have a date with my girlfriend. What

s wrong with that. Look how long it

ve seen him. You met him once, and that

was four months ago. It

s just not right. Every time I

arrange something, you run away. Don

kill you to have dinner with him once."

She had a point there, so I kept quiet. In fact, I had been

trying to avoid crossing paths with him, but to me it

seemed the most natural thing in the world to do. We

had nothing in common to talk about, and it was

exhausting to tell jokes using my sister as a

simultaneous interpreter.

"Will you please just join us this once? If you

much for me, I promise I won

t interfere with your sex

life till the end of the summer."

"My sex life is pretty feeble at the moment. It might not

make it through the summer."

"You will be home for dinner this Sunday, though,

"How can I say no?"

ll probably fix the stereo for us. He

s good at that."

"Good with his hands, huh?"

"You and your dirty mind," she said, and hung up.

i chi em cho bi

ống ngày ấ

được không?

ậy thì bỏ cái hẹ

ế là đượ

and yawned twice.

"Did you see my note?" she asked.

I put on my necktie and went to work.

The weather was clear all that week. Each day was like a

continuation of the previous one. Wednesday night, I

called my girlfriend to say we couldn

t get together on

the weekend. She was understandably annoyed: We

t seen each other for three weeks. Receiver still in

Đâu có đượ

ế thì đâu có đượ

ũng không đượ

có lý nên tôi

nhiên mà tôi đã

i Watanabe Noboru. Ngh

Watanabe Noboru

Và nói đùa mà

ời thì mệt cho tôi quá.

-"Em van anh. G

ạt tình ái củ

. Em tôi nói.

ết có qua đượ

ết hè không?

ẳng làm sao hơ

ấy rành nhữ

ấy ngón tay anh ta hẳn là khéo léo lắ

Tôi thắt cà-vạ

nhiên là cô ấ

nhà cô gái đã đ

I laid the magazine down and studied the list. Lettuce,

tomatoes, celery, French dressing, smoked salmon,

mustard, onions, soup stock, potatoes, parsley, three

"Steaks? I just had steak last night. Why don

"Maybe you had steak last night, but we didn

so selfish. You can

t serve croquettes when you have a

guest for dinner."

"If some girl invited me to her house and fed me fresh-

fried croquettes, I

d be deeply moved. With a nice pile

of julienned white cabbage, a bowl of miso clam soup

"Maybe so, but I have decided on steak. Next time I

feed you croquettes till you drop, but today you

to make do with steak. Please."

ờ sáng chủ

ật, em tôi dựng tôi dậ

hand, I dialed the college girl I had made a date with for

Sunday, but she was out. She was out again on Thursday

My sister woke me up at eight o

clock on Sunday

"Get out of bed, will you? I have to wash the sheets."

She stripped the sheets and pillowcase and ordered me

out of my pajamas. My only refuge was the bathroom,

where I showered and shaved. She was getting to be

more and more like our mother. Women are like salmon:

In the end, they all swim back to the same place.

After the shower, I put on a pair of shorts and a faded T-

shirt, and with long, long yawns I drank a glass of

orange juice. My veins still carried some of last night

alcohol; opening the Sunday paper would have been too

much for me. I nibbled a few soda crackers from the box

on the kitchen table and decided that that was all the

breakfast I needed.

My sister threw the sheets into the washing machine and

cleaned our two rooms. Next, she put some soap and

water in a bucket and washed down the walls and floors

of the living room and kitchen. I sprawled on the sofa all

this time, looking at the nude photos in a copy of Hustler

that a friend of mine in the States had gotten past the

postal censors. Amazing, the variety in shape and size of

the female sex organ. They can be as different as

s heights or IQs.

"Stop hanging around and do some shopping for me,

will you?" She handed me a list crammed full of things

to buy. "And please hide that magazine. He

ll be fine," I told her reassuringly. I can be a pain

in the neck, but finally I

m a kind, understanding human

I went to the neighborhood supermarket and bought

everything on the list. On the way home, I stopped off at

ứ sáu, cô ấ

Tôi đành vào phòng

ỏ này càng ngày càng

ụ nhà mình. Đàn bà

không khác gì cá

ối cùng rồ

đùi, tròng lên

ư không còn nhìn

báo sáng. Trên bàn

bánh khô nên tôi

ữa sáng vậ

phòng tôi và phòng cô ấ

khách, sàn phòng ă

ế dài phòng khách,

ờ Hustler-không-cạ

các hình thù khác

lên bàn, nhìn chòng

xông khói, mù-tạ

xúp, khoai tây, thịt bò bíp-tế

ột chiên thị

ột chiên thị

ật là tuyệ

luôn, còn hôm

ịt bò bíp-tế

cùng thì tôi

"Change into those," she said.

With another silent sigh, I did as I was told. I couldn

have said anything to her that would have brought me

back my pleasantly messy, peaceful Sunday.

NOBORU WATANABE came riding up at three.

Astride his trusty cycle, he arrived with the gentle

zephyrs of springtime. I caught the ominous put-put of

his 500CC Honda from a quarter mile away. I stuck my

head out over the edge of the balcony to see him parking

next to the entrance of our apartment house and taking

off his helmet. Fortunately, once he removed that white

dome with its STP sticker, his outfit today approached

that of a normal human being: overstarched button-down

check shirt, baggy white pants, and brown loafers with

though the color of the shoes and belt didn

"I think your friend from Fisherman

s Wharf is here," I

said to my sister, who was peeling potatoes at the

"Keep him company for a while, will you? I

"Bad idea. I don

t know what to talk to him about. You

t be silly. It wouldn

t look right for me to leave

you in the kitchen. You talk to him."

The bell rang, and I opened the door to find Noboru

Watanabe standing there. I showed him into the living

room and settled him onto the couch. His gift for the

evening was a selection of Baskin-Robbins

flavors, but cramming it into our tiny, already-stuffed

freezer took a major effort on my part. What a pain. Of

all the things he could have brought, why did he have to

pick ice cream?

"How about a beer?"

"No thanks. I think I

m allergic to alcohol. One glass is

enough to make me sick."

ộ ấy vào đ

vào, không hó hé

nào. Có nói gì đ

Watanabe Noboru

nhiên là gác chân

rãi, giày đế

ưng không hợp màu nhau mà thôi.

Fisherman’s Wharf

. Em tôi nói.

vào phòng khách,

ỏi. Quà gì không chọ

ọn quà kem lạ

a liquor store and bought a 4,500-yen bottle of

my gift to the young couple. Only a kind,

understanding human being would think of something

At home, I found a blue Ralph Lauren polo shirt and a

spotless pair of cotton pants neatly folded on the bed.

"I once drank a whole washbasinful of beer on a bet with

some college friends."

"What did it do to you?"

"My pee stank beer for two whole days. And I kept

burping up this

t you have Noboru look at the stereo set?"

được thôi.

Thêm vào đấ

He crouched down in front of the stereo like a mongoose

ready to spring.

After fiddling with all the switches, he announced, "It

definitely in the amplifier system, but it

s not internal."

"How can you tell?"

"By the inductive method."

Oh, sure, the inductive method.

He pulled out the mini-preamp and the power amplifier,

removed all the cords connecting them, and began to

examine each one. While he was busy with this, I took a

can of Budweiser from the refrigerator and drank it

"It must be fun to be able to drink alcohol," he said as he

poked at a plug with a mechanical pencil.

"I wonder," I said. "I

ve been doing it so long I wouldn

have anything to compare it with."

ve been practicing a little."

"Practicing drinking?"

"Yes. Is there something odd about that?"

"No, not at all. You should start with white wine. Put

some in a big glass with ice, cut it with Perrier and a

squeeze of lemon juice. That

s what I drink instead of

ll give it a try," he said. "Aha! I thought so!"

"The connecting cords between the preamp and the

power amp. The connection

s been broken at the plugs

on both channels. This kind of pin plug can

movement. In addition to which, they

re cheaply made.

ll bet somebody moved the amplifier recently."

"I did the other day, when I was cleaning," said my

She looked at me. "We got this thing from your

s their fault for using such weak parts."

t make it," I muttered. "I just do the

interjected my sister, who had come along in the nick of

time, as if she had smelled smoke, with two glasses of

"Good idea," said Noboru.

re good with your hands," I said.

s true," he confessed unabashedly. "I always used to

enjoy making plastic models and radio kits. Anytime

something broke in the house, I

with the stereo?"

"No sound," I said. I turned on the amp and put on a

record to show him.

t worry," said Noboru Watanabe. "I can fix it right

ve got a soldering iron."

lên bàn, nói chen vào.

Nghe nói cậu khéo tay?

không phát ra tiế

ừng nút khoá đ

ện trên máy.

ện bên trong

ạp-pháp đấ

ạp-pháp đấ

ếch-âm và máy

budweiser trong t

đầu bút chì chạm vào đầu dây nố

ồi nên không biết. Không so sánh đượ

Vâng. Có kỳ quái không anh?

đá vào, rót thêm

ếch-âm và máy

ớ có lúc quét

. Em tôi nói.

ắc vì thế mà hở

ộ máy này là

Watanabe Noboru nói. -

Nhà có không anh?

ll zip out and buy one. You really ought

to have a soldering iron in the house. They come in

ll bet. But I don

t know where there

hardware store."

"I do. I passed one on the way."

I stuck my head out over the balcony again and watched

Noboru Watanabe strap on his helmet, mount his bike,

and disappear around a corner.

s so nice," sighed my sister.

"Yeah, a real honey."

NOBORU WATANABE finished repairing the pin

plugs before five o

clock. He asked to hear some easy-

listening vocals, so my sister put on a Julio Iglesias

record. Since when did we have crap like that in the

Noboru asked me, "What kind of music do you like?"

"Oh, I just love stuff like this," I blurted out. "You

know: Bruce Springsteen, Jeff Beck, the Doors."

ve never heard of any of those. Are they like

"Yeah, a lot like Julio."

He talked about the new computer system that his

project team was currently developing. It was designed

to generate an instantaneous diagram showing the most

effective method for returning trains to the depot after an

accident. In fact, it sounded like a great idea, but the

principle made about as much sense to me as Finnish

verb conjugations. While he raved on and on, I nodded

at appropriate times and thought about women

who I should take where to drink what on my next day

off, including where we would eat and the hotel we

use. I must have an inborn liking for such things. Just as

there are those who like to make plastic models and

draw train diagrams, I like to get drunk with women and

sleep with them. It was a matter of Destiny, something

that surpassed all human understanding.

Around the time I was finishing my fourth beer, dinner

was ready: smoked salmon, vichyssoise, steak, salad,

and fried potatoes. As always, my sister

pretty good. I opened the Chablis and drank it alone.

"A soldering iron? Not in this house."

As he sliced his tenderloin, Noboru Watanabe asked me,

"Why did you take a job with an appliance

manufacturer? I gather you

re not particularly interested

in electrical devices."

My sister answered for me. "He

s not particularly

interested in anything that

s of benefit to society. He

would have taken a job anywhere. It just so happened he

Tôi nói. Các

Tôi nói, không

bán đồ máy móc ở

y ngang qua". Watanabe

ng xem Watanabe

toàn, gác chân

ấy là ngườ

Tôi mềm lòng rồ

c Julio Iglesias.

có trong nhà tôi vậy kìa?

Bruce Springsteen, Jeff Beck,

Đại khái cũ

thì tính toán

ở đâu, vào khách

này thôi. Có

còn tôi thì thích đ

ng xong lon bia th

không thích đ

". Watanabe Noboru v

ứ gì có ích

làm thì đâu

t have said it any better myself," I chimed in.

"All he thinks about is having fun. It never occurs to him

to concentrate on anything seriously, to make himself a

better person."

"Yours truly, the summer grasshopper."

"He gets a kick out of smirking at those who do choose

to live seriously."

"Now, there you

re wrong," I interjected. "What I do has

nothing to do with what anybody else does. I just go

along burning my own calories in accordance with my

own ideas about things. What other people do doesn

concern me. I don

t smirk at them; I don

them. I may be a good-for-nothing, but at least I don

get in the way of other people."

s not true!" cried Noboru Watanabe in something

like a reflex action. "You

re not a good-for-nothing!" He

must have been brought up well.

"Thank you," I said, raising my wineglass to him. "And

by the way, congratulations on your engagement. Sorry

to be the only one drinking."

re planning to have the ceremony in October," he

said. "Probably too late to invite the squirrels and bears."

"Not to worry," I said. Incredible, he was making jokes!

"So, where will you go on your honeymoon? I suppose

you can get discount fares?"

"Hawaii," my sister answered curtly.

We talked for a while about airplanes. Having just read

several books on the crash in the Andes, I brought up

"When they ate human flesh, they would roast it in the

sun on pieces of aluminum from the airplane."

My sister stopped eating and glared at me. "Why do you

have to talk about such awful things at the dinner table?

Do you say things like that when you

re eating with girls

re trying to seduce?"

Like a guest invited to dinner by a feuding married

couple, Noboru Watanabe tried to come between us by

asking me, "Have you ever thought of marrying?"

"Never had the chance," I said as I was about to put a

chunk of fried potato in my mouth. "I had to raise my

little sister without any help, and then came the long

"War? What war?"

Đúng thế đấ

. Tôi đồng ý hoàn toàn.

… thì hoàn toàn chả

ười mà cho là quê mùa nữ

. Em tôi nói.

Cái đó thì không đúng đâu

ý mình thôi,

khác thì không lý đế

ất, anh không làm phiề

ười nào khác

". Watanabe Noboru

ẳn là giáo dụ

Tôi nói, nâng

đính hôn. Xin lỗ

ột mình không mờ

had an in with that particular company."

s just another one of his stupid jokes," said my sister,

shaking the bottle of salad dressing.

"Just another one of my stupid jokes," I added. "But the

part about not having had the chance is true. I

been a narrow-minded guy, and I never used to wash my

socks, so I was never able to find a nice girl who wanted

to spend her life with me. Unlike you."

"Was there something wrong with your socks?" asked

hãng này đấy thôi

Watanabe Noboru

mà để tâm làm gì

còn nói đùa

đâu? Công ty du lị

ớt vé cho em đấ

. Em tôi đáp.

tán các cô, đ

ũng nói nhữ

Watanabe Noboru chen

ặc nhau mà lạ

ời khách đế

" Watanabe Noboru ng

ến tranh nào thế

ộn vào xà-lách.

thêm vào đấ

ả. Không đượ

anh?" Watanabe Noboru h

m really a shy person."

re just plain arrogant."

m shy and arrogant," I explained to Noboru Watanabe

as I poured myself more wine. "I have this shy, arrogant

way of returning trains to the depot after an accident."

"I think I see what you mean," he said, nodding. "But do

you know what I think? I think that after you

mean, after she and I get married

that you are going to

start wanting to get married, too."

"You may be right," I said.

"Really?" my sister piped up. "If you

re really thinking

about getting married, I

ve got a good friend, a nice girl,

d be glad to introduce you."

"Sure. When the time comes," I said. "Too dangerous

ỉ em tôi và hỏ

À, chỉ vì cô ấy là em ruột tôi

làm gì thì làm,

không đả độ

ỉ vì anh nhút nhát đấy thôi

. Em tôi nói.

Nhút nhát mà

cho Watanabe Noboru.

cách nhút nhát, có lúc

ất là đượ

còn nguy hiểm quá

n Julio Iglesias

i". Watanabe Noboru

ưng mà, kết hôn có vẻ đáng sợ

ếu có xảy ra, thì đến lúc ấ

Noboru Watanabe.

s a joke, too," my sister explained wearily. "I

wash his socks, at least, every day."

Noboru Watanabe nodded and laughed for one and a

half seconds. I was determined to make him laugh for

three seconds next time.

s been spending her life with you, hasn

he said, gesturing toward my sister.

"Well, after all, she

ve stayed together because you do anything

you please and I don

t say a thing. But that

life. In a real, grown-up, adult life, people confront each

other honestly. I

m not saying the past five years with

s been a free and easy time for

me. But lately, I

ve come to see that it

s not a real life. It

the feel of what real life

is all about. All you think about is yourself, and if

somebody tries to have a serious conversation with you,

you make fun of them."

WHEN DINNER WAS OVER, we moved to the living

room for coffee. This time my sister put on a Willie

maybe one small step up from Julio

My sister was in the kitchen, cleaning up, when Noboru

Watanabe said to me with an air of confidentiality, "To

tell you the truth, I wanted to stay single until I was

closer to thirty, like you. But when I met her, all I could

think of was getting married."

s a good kid," I said. "She can be stubborn and a

little constipated, but I really think you

"Still, the idea of getting married is kind of frightening,

"Well, if you make an effort to always look at the good

side, always think about the good things, there

to be afraid of. If something bad comes up, you can

think again at that point."

Watanabe Noboru g

ưỡi. Tôi hẹ

"Is that all you think about?" she said with an air of

disgust, but she didn

t try to stop me from going out.

I went back to the living room and told Noboru

Watanabe that I had an errand to run and might be late

m glad we had a chance to talk," he said. "Please be

sure to visit us often after we

"Thanks," I said, momentarily shutting down my

t you dare drive," my sister called out to me as I

was leaving. "You

ve had too much to drink."

It was a little before eight when I entered a

neighborhood bar. I sat at the counter, drinking an I.W.

Harper on the rocks. The TV behind the bar was tuned to

a Giants-Swallows game. The sound was off, and

instead they had a Cyndi Lauper record going. The

pitchers were Nishimoto and Obana, and the Swallows

were ahead, 3-2. There was something to be said for

watching TV with the sound off.

I had three whiskeys while I watched the ball game. It

was the bottom of the seventh, score tied 3-3, when the

broadcast ended at nine o

clock and the set was switched

off. Two seats away from me was a girl around twenty I

had seen there a few times. She had been watching the

game, too, so I started talking to her about baseball. "I

a Giants fan," she said. "Which team do you like?"

re all the same to me. I just like to watch them

s the fun of that? How can you get excited about

t have to get excited. I

m not playing. They are."

I had two more whiskeys on the rocks and treated her to

two daiquiris. She was a major in commercial design at

Tokyo University of the Arts, so we talked about art in

advertising. At ten, we moved on to a bar with more

comfortable seats, where I had a whiskey and she had a

grasshopper. She was pretty drunk by this time, and so

was I. At eleven, I accompanied her to her apartment,

where we had sex as a matter of course, the way they

give you a cushion and a cup of tea at an inn.

Watanabe Noboru

. Tôi nói, không số

Tôi vào quán

a Cindy Lauper. Ng

không có âm thanh mà xem cũng không đế

"You may be right."

m good at giving advice to others." I went to the

kitchen and told my sister I would be going out for a

t come back before ten o

clock, so the two of you

can relax and enjoy yourselves. The sheets are fresh."

Có lẽ đúng như anh nói

khác thì tôi

ỉ nói đượ

đây một lúc.

ờ đêm đâu,

ẻ chán ngán.

i Watanabe Noboru

đi trong xóm, có thể

ở quán này,

tôi thích độ

nào. Tôi đáp

khác làm, có

đá, và đãi cô

pha rum-chanh "daiquiri".

nên chúng tôi nói

thì tôi và cô

"grass-hopper".

mà chính tôi

nhiên là đã

ới cô. Như khách đến thì mờ

ồi và đãi trà vậ

Outside, my alcoholic high tore through me like a

midnight freight. I felt like shit. My joints creaked like

the Tin Woodman

s in The Wizard of Oz. I bought a can

of juice from a vending machine to sober me up, but the

second I drank it down I vomited the entire contents of

my stomach onto the road

the corpses of my steak and

smoked salmon and lettuce and tomatoes.

How many years had it been since I last vomited from

drinking? What the hell was I doing these days? The

same thing over and over. But each repetition was worse

than the one before. Then, with no connection at all, I

thought about Noboru Watanabe and the soldering iron

he had bought me. "You really ought to have a soldering

iron in the house. They come in handy," he had said.

What a wholesome idea, I said to him mentally as I

wiped my lips with a handkerchief. Now, thanks to you,

my house is equipped with a soldering iron. But because

of that damned soldering iron, my house doesn

like my house any longer. That

s probably because I

have such a narrow personality.

IT WAS AFTER midnight by the time I got home. The

motorcycle was, of course, no longer parked by the front

entrance. I took the elevator to the fourth floor, unlocked

the apartment door, and went in. Everything was pitch-

black except for a small fluorescent light above the sink.

My sister had probably gotten fed up and gone to bed. I

I poured myself a glass of orange juice and emptied it in

one gulp. I used lots of soap in the shower to wash the

foul-smelling sweat from my body, and then I did a

thorough job of brushing my teeth. My face in the

bathroom mirror was enough to give me chills. I looked

like one of those middle-aged men you see on the last

trains from downtown, sprawling drunk on the seats and

fouling themselves with their own vomit. My skin was

rough, my eyes looked sunken, and my hair had lost its

sheen. shook my head and turned out the bathroom light.

"Put the light out," she said, so I did. From her window

you could see a big Nikon ad tower. A TV next door

was blasting the day

s pro-baseball results. What with

the darkness and my drunkenness, I hardly knew what I

was doing. You couldn

t call it sex. I just moved my

penis and discharged some semen. As soon as the

moderately abbreviated act was finished, she went to

sleep as if she couldn

t wait any longer to be

unconscious. Without even bothering to wipe up

properly, I got dressed and left. The hardest thing was

picking out my polo shirt and underpants from among

her stuff in the dark.

With nothing on but a towel wrapped around my waist, I

went to the kitchen and drank some tap water.

Something will work out tomorrow, I thought. And if

ừ phòng bên

hình bóng-chày-chuyên-nghiệ

nên làm gì thì chính mình

ược-hoá đế

thì cô gái đã

ở hàng đêm, đã

trong phim "The Wizard of Oz -

ừ máy bán hàng

rau xà-lách, cà chua, …

mình làm cái trò gì mà

mà càng làm, càng

Watanabe Noboru

Watanabe Noboru

đã có đượ

không còn là nhà

ỉ vì tôi là người có tính hẹp hòi.

ọ thì đã quá

không còn bóng dáng

ỉ có đèn ố

còn sáng, còn

ảm giác lúc bấ

mùi, và đánh

rùng mình vì khuôn

ồng lên, tóc khô, xơ xác.

"You were so late tonight," came my sister

of the gloom. She was sitting on the living-room couch,

drinking a beer alone.

"I was drinking," I said.

"You drink too much."

"I know." I got a beer from the refrigerator and sat down

across from her. For a while, neither of us said anything.

We sat there, occasionally tipping back our beer cans.

The leaves of the potted plants on the balcony fluttered

in the breeze, and beyond them floated the misty

semicircle of the moon.

"Just to let you know, we didn

t do it," she said.

"Do anything. Something got on my nerves. I just

"Oh." I seem to lose the power of speech on half-moon

t you going to ask what got on my nerves?"

"What got on your nerves?"

"This room! This place! I just couldn

"Hey, is something wrong with you? Are you feeling

m tired. Even I get tired sometimes."

She looked at me without a word. I drained the last sip

of my beer and rested my head on the seat back, eyes

"Was it our fault? Did we make you tired?"

"No way," I said with my eyes still closed.

"Are you too tired to talk?" she asked in a tiny voice.

ế dài phòng

ều quá đấ

không nói gì

ăng bán nguyệ

là đã không làm gì

làm gì đượ

ệt, không hiểu sao tôi lại ít nói.

tôi lại nói.

E dè chuyện gì thế

phòng này đấ

dè, nên không làm đượ

nhìn tôi đă

n lon bia, xong ng

. Tôi đáp, mắ

Em tôi nói, giọ

ười lên nhìn em tôi, lắ

not, then tomorrow I

ll do some thinking. Ob-la-di, ob-

la-da, life goes on.

I straightened up and looked at her. Then I shook my

m worried. Did I say something terrible to you today?

Something about you yourself, or about the way you

"Not at all," I said.

"Everything you

ve said lately has been right on the

t worry. But what

s bothering you now, all

t know, it just sort of popped into my mind after

he left, while I was waiting for you. I wondered if I

t gone too far."

I got two cans of beer from the refrigerator, switched on

the stereo, and put on the Richie Beirach Trio at very

low volume. It was the record I listened to whenever I

came home drunk in the middle of the night.

đã nói gì không

là, nói gì đấ

ề tính tình,

đã nói gì đấ

nh ra hai lon bia, m

a Richie Beirach Trio,

s hard on somebody," I said. "But if I

one you chose to be hard on, you made the right choice.

t let it worry you."

"Sometimes, I don

t know, it scares me. The future."

"You have to make an effort to always look at the good

side, always think about the good things. Then you

got nothing to be afraid of. If something bad comes up,

you do more thinking at that point." I gave her the same

speech I had given Noboru Watanabe.

"But what if things don

t work out the way you want

t work out, that

s when you think again."

She gave a little laugh.

re as strange as ever."

"Say, can I ask you one question?" I yanked open

another can of beer.

"How many men did you sleep with before him?"

She hesitated a moment before holding up two fingers.

"And one was your age, and the other was an older

"How did you know?"

s a pattern." I took another swig of beer. "I haven

been fooling around for nothing all these years. I

learned that much."

"How many girls have you slept with?"

"Twenty-six. I counted them up the other day. There

were twenty-six I could remember. There might be

another ten or so I can

m not keeping a

diary or anything."

"Why do you sleep with so many girls?"

t know," I answered honestly. "I guess I

stop at some point, but I can

t seem to figure out how."

re a little confused," I said. "These

changes in life are like changes in the barometric

m kind of confused, too, in my own way."

"Am I being hard on you?" she asked.

We remained silent for a while, alone with our own

thoughts. From the distance came the sound of a

s exhaust, but it couldn

t have been Noboru

s. Not at one o

clock in the morning.

"Tell me," she said, "what do you really think of him?"

"Noboru Watanabe?"

s not a bad guy, I guess. Just not my type. Funny

taste in clothes, for one thing." I thought about it some

i trong sinh ho

đâu. Cho nên chẳng có gì phải áy náy cả

. Em tôi nói.

mà thôi. Làm

ế thì không còn

Watanabe Noboru.

Em tôi cười khúc khích.

. Em tôi nói.

này có đượ

Tôi nói, kéo khoen lon bia lên.

ấy thì đã ngủ

Làm sao anh biế

Đúng tiêu chuẩ

ải không anh?

ế là lành mạ

Còn anh, đã ngủ

ới bao nhiêu ngườ

ký đâu mà nói

ự mình không

Watanabe Noboru.

Đã 1 giờ sáng rồ

Này, anh nghĩ

Watanabe Noboru

When I closed my eyes, sleep floated down on me like a

dark, silent net.

translated by Jay Rubin

dài trên đấ

ĩ sâu xa về

Phạm Vũ Thịnh dịch 07-2004

- Family Affair"

more and said, "There

s nothing wrong in having one

guy like him in every family."

s what I think. And then there

s you: this person I

call my brother. I

m very fond of you, but if everybody

were like you the world would probably be a terrible

"You may be right."

We drank what was left of the beer and withdrew to our

separate rooms. My sheets were new and clean and tight.

I stretched out on top of them and looked through the

curtain at the moon. Where were we headed? I

wondered. But I was far too tired to think very deeply

about such things.

đình, có mộ